I Thought It Was a Common Transmigration - Chapter 23

At that moment, a voice that seemed like it could be extinguished at any moment called out to me.

“Hey, are you in a lot of pain?”

I sobbed and turned around to see a girl about my age with no hair on her head.

Her cheeks were sunken in and she was as pale as if she’d been covered in a layer of flour, but as far as I could tell, she was a beautiful child.

I shook my head. “Sob, n-no……”

She came to my side, pushing the IV rack aside with a worried look on her face.

“Then why are you crying so much?”

“I’m sorry if I was noisy…….”

“No, I cry a lot too. Is it because you’re scared of dying too?”

At that moment, for some reason, she felt uneasy.

“I’d rather be dead!”

“What? Why……?” the child asked in surprise.

“My mom and dad think I’m nothing but a nuisance, and when I found out that my brother’s bone marrow was a match for me, he told me to die. Sob…… I’d rather be dead now.”

I don’t know why I told that story to a child I didn’t even know.

And I don’t know why I said something so flippant in a leukemia hospital room, where the shadow of death always looms.

She sat next to me, twiddling her fingers in silence for a while, then said in a very small voice, “Why…… are you talking about…… dying when you can live?”

It was such a small voice, and I held my breath.

She continued, “Because if you live…… you can change the future, and sure, you might not be happy…… but at least you’re taking a chance.”

“Ah……”

“I don’t even have that chance. The day I leave this hospital room is the day I die, and if I die, I won’t be able to repay my mom and dad for all they’ve done for me, I won’t be able to see my friends anymore, and I won’t be able to turn twenty.”

Her pretty eyes were watery. “I envy you so much, but…… don’t say that. If you can live, you should live somehow. Don’t just give up……”

“I’m sorry……”

All I could do was say I was sorry to a child who looked so much worse than me.

A few days later, I got my bone marrow transplant.

As I was waiting in the recovery room for my brother’s bone marrow transplant, a nurse came over and said, “Luckily, there’s a bed available in a five-person room. We’re getting it ready now, so please wait here for a bit.”

My parents rubbed their chests, saying how lucky they were because they almost had to go to a double-occupancy room.

I didn’t think much of it at the time.

But when I returned to the hospital room, it was the same one I’d been in for days, only my bed had been changed to that child’s bed.

“E- excuse me! Where is the child who was here……”

My mom furrowed her brow and elbowed me in the side as I wondered about the child’s whereabouts.

“You’re not supposed to ask that here!”

Only then did I realize

The child had left the hospital after a long stay.

“The day I leave this hospital room is the day I die.”

I shuddered at the memory of that voice.

***

As she took her last breath, I realized how envious she must have been of my bone marrow transplant, and how sad she was that she would never have another chance.

And from then on, I didn’t talk about dying.

Even when I was flooded with thoughts of dying, I couldn’t help but think of that child.

‘I’m already thinking about dying, that’s too bad, isn’t it?’

I clenched my teeth, recalling the face of a child whose name I didn’t know.

Tears formed in the corners of my eyes, but I quickly wiped them away with my sleeve.

‘Cheer up. I haven’t given my best yet. I still have a chance.’

I vowed to be more positive.

***

Once I changed my mind, my life became more relaxed.

Probation was a punishment, but for a homebody like me, it was just a peaceful break.

It would have been, if not for Killian’s unexpected appearance.

“Do you really…… have to come at this hour?”

“I have no time to spare.”

Since he happened to come at mealtime, I had to sit across from him to eat.

“Ha…… okay, well, you must be busy, so what brings you here today?”

He didn’t answer my question, just tore into his bread and scooped up some stew.

He was a very picturesque man, even when he was eating, but I tilted my head and blatantly show disrespect.

“Killian?”

Despite my call, he slowly cleared his throat and sloshed his mouth with wine before answering.

“It’s not polite to talk when you have food in your mouth, is it?”

“That’s right.”

He continued to eat without another word.

Eventually, I had no choice but to eat, and it was a wise choice.

“Mmm!”

I exclaimed as the stew was so delicious that I forgot all about my snarky remarks to Killian earlier.

The Ludwig family’s chef was very good indeed.

In the Riegelhoff family, they only fed me enough birdseed to keep me in shape. But since this is a Rofan novel, even after I came to the Duchy of Ludwig and ate as much as I wanted, I still stayed in shape.

This is a real fantasy world.

“……you’re eating well.”

“Mmm. It’s really good,” I replied, not even looking at Killian.

This beef stew was more important than his gracious face right now.

The tender beef chewed gently, and the gravy with the aroma of milk exploded in my mouth.

I don’t know what it’s made from, but the sweet and addictive taste of the roux goes fantastically well with the boring bread.

As I began to lament the stew that was almost gone, Killian nonchalantly slid a small bowl with a lid in front of me.

‘What is this?’

Without thinking, I lifted the lid and found more stew.

“Huh? Why is this in here?”

“It’s extra in case we need more food.”

“Ah…… this, can I eat it?”

“Hah…… yes.”

“Do you want to share?”

“No thanks.”

Then don’t sigh, or don’t make it so obvious!

“Then…… thank you for the food.”

I also emptied the stew from the extra plate.

Killian watched me eat, then muttered to himself, “It goes down your throat just fine.”

It’s been quiet for a while. Was the devil’s snout finally starting up?

“Why not, I’m innocent, I didn’t do it, why should I be punished?”

“I hope you’re right. I’m currently investigating every other route the documents could have gone. As you said…… Lizé is also under investigation, and we’re not doing it lightly just because she’s involved.”

“Oh, that’s surprising.”

“The investigation is fair to the end, so don’t worry about partiality.”

“Okay.”

I didn’t press the point, not wanting to argue with him.

He sat there with a serious look on his face, as if he had something more to say, but eventually, he got up without saying anything.

“I will go back for now.”

“Okay.”

Come to think of it, it was the first time I’d ever sat so close to him for a meal.

I think it somehow made the food taste better, and it also made me feel bad when he said he had to go.

‘Ugh, this guy. Anyway, it was nice to have a handsome guy by my side, so I didn’t lose my mind……’

He seemed to treat me more like a human than last time, so I got even more excited.

Killian and I parted ways with an awkward goodbye.

After that, all that was left was time.

Sure, I was happy to be rolling around on the bed, but by the third day, I was getting a little bored.

‘Why don’t I pursue a hobby while I can?’

Yes, this is the time.

I’ve always loved tinkering and decorating in my past life, but I never really got around to it because I didn’t have the money or time.

But now it’s different!

‘What should I start? Embroidery or knitting?’

I wondered, and I called Anna. She was the only person I could call and talk to right now.

“Anna, Anna, do you know what hobbies the ladies of other families enjoy these days?”

“Usually embroidery or painting, and for the more active ones, horseback riding.”

“Anything else interesting?”

Anna hesitated at the bottomless pit of my question, then opened her mouth cautiously. “It’s not a hobby of noble ladies…… but commoner girls from well-to-do families do play with prince and princess dolls……”

“You mean they make the dolls themselves?”

“No. They make clothes out of the rags that are left over from their wooden dolls, and some of the girls from very well-to-do families make quite extravagant outfits for them. It’s a hobby that their parents generously allow them to do because it’s good for their sewing skills.”

Does it feel like dressing up a Barbie doll? Sounds like fun.

“I want to try that. Where can I buy a wooden doll?”

“Commoner children usually ask their fathers to make them…… but if you’d like to try, I’ll place an order with the craftsman myself.”

Wow…… a wooden doll made by your father, how precious it must be. I’m so jealous.